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I’m starting this blog with a mix of feelings. Out of curiosity firstly, a kind of own research,  but also as a means of self-expression. I will be mainly dealing with aspects on how a person can learn to move through those cracks in their own shell, and by that then you learn to also break up with past life misconceptions. These wounds although deep, can only give shape and sense to my/our reality. So this is a new and unknown path of expression, and it’s about the way I have to explain how it is felt to be torn in pieces and how you struggle to find the light again and feel like living again. Survival.

I’ll use my drawings and paintings and words together with the songs and their lyrics, music, documentaries, books, people, trips and any idea I can come up with through the feelings that may come out of them. I am using English, but also Spanish because it’s my mother tongue, but I’ll try to write every post in English too, in fact I feel more comfortable writing in English because I feel it more flexible at the time of writing, although I know that I still make mistakes sometimes. It will be basically a trip through the awakened feelings out of music, pictures and words which can run through the boundaries of languages.

Centenary Lime In Sintra

Growing always comes after pain and breakdown

I’ll move from the destruction the seed undergoes trying to explain how the human being can get a profit and heal through music, painting and writing, and because it helps me a lot, it may help someone else. I would like to show that we shouldn’t fear pain, on the contrary. Although it is really painful, we need to dive through it to be able to find down deep inside the source that originates it. Once there, we can feel it and let it go, and when you release it you feel free of criticism, powerlessness or incomprehension. It’s in that very moment when you realize you can’t go deeper than you were before so you know you can start growing again to shine your greatest light again.

I know this is going to be difficult, really difficult. I’ll have to face some demons I hid down there somewhere, but I also feel that this is something I should do for myself. My language will be natural, as I usually speak, I won’t either be politically correct or cast pearls for those who don’t want to understand or see. Maybe some could feel offended sometimes or can misunderstand me and believe I’m overreacting. Anyway, these are my HONEST and TRUE feelings and ideas about everything surrounding me. My search for the truth. MY TRUTH.

So… I’ll laugh sometimes, I’ll talk to myself others, or to whoever is reading if the case, I can change the topic on a sudden or not, I will probably do whatever I feel like at the moment. BUT there’s something I need to explain, and that is the fact that I’m not a writer, or artist or a professional whatever-the-name-will-be-called doing this and my intention is being none of those. My drawings won’t be perfect because I have a lack of the knowledge and skills to do anything better, but there’s something else that they will indeed be.

They will be my best attempt at explaining whatever the topic will be, and I can assure you that I’ll do my best as I always do with anything that I feel committed to. Being in this case the most important commitment I have ever done. TO MYSELF. Because most of all, I have to be true to myself. Honest to myself. I must let myself free to EXPRESS whatever I feel like expressing and I need to be honest to allow my SELF be what it really IS. I have to listen to my soul carefully to let her speak through my words and drawings. Yes. That’s what this is all about. I’m going to ABSOLUTELY give the best of me.

My pearls

With every song I’ll try to put into words how to be torn to pieces and how it is possible to get over it and feel the strength to desire living again. So I’ll use music, the lyrics and what they make me feel, and my words, ideas and drawings or pictures coming of the mixture of evertything. I’m writing in both English and Spanish most of the posts, and basically it’ll be a journey through the feelings awaken with my “pearl” songs, as I name them. (Some of them could be really known but others not so much, because the type of music I like is not mainstream precisely… at least here in my country Spain).

I leave. Go. Set sail. Weigh anchor. And as we Galicians say: “I leave because I have to!”

What an amazing trip!!

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